i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
Randomize
