My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.
Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
You do realize it’s only a matter of time before I have a bad day and come home with an alpaca?
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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