his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
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