How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
Sometimes while peeing I'll go hands free, put my arms up by my chest and make claw hands, and pretend I'm a new type of dinosaur called Dickosaurus Rex.
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
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