I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
Randomize
