the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
Trying to figure out the logistics of putting my laptop speakers on this plate with the last slice of pizza. Too drunk to move the plate. Not an option.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
Randomize
