Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
Your children are clinging to me like my teets are full of bountiful milkiness. They're driving me nuts. I felt my uterus shrivel up.
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
Randomize
