ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
I am in the checkout line at the dollar store and there is a guy in front of me holding a pregnancy test, a chocolate bar, and fake roses. Champion.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize
