I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
If hangovers were people John Goodman would be living in my skull trying to eat the back of my eyes
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
