oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
You came home with a traffic cone and said, "this is my birthday condom."
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
Randomize
