How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
Randomize
