"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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