I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
Randomize
