I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
I guess she found the pillow case full of vomit I hid last night: "Oh my God. Oh my God. In my fucking FRIDGE?! Really? Hope your dick falls off there's puke all over my food. Fucking die."
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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