new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
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