it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
Just want the two of you to know, I went to a golf tournament today. Respectable, expensive… Flipped the golf cart. Seriously, I'm 40. What the fuck?
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
Randomize
