at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
Randomize
