First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
Randomize
