Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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