I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
The old woman next to me on the el smells like cupcakes...but she doesn't taste like cupcakes
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
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