During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
Randomize
