belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Randomize
