I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
You're having sex and i just smoked and made oatmeal...i'll give you some time to be jealous
If you dedicate your next bite to me, I'll dedicate my first orgasm to you.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
Randomize
