If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
Found your dick twin last night
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Randomize
