It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
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