i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
Just had an old man tip me two dollars and say "here put this in your baby fund, you'll have a baby someday" I swear this is gods way of saying GET ON BIRTH CONTROL NOW!
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
She said she liked strap-ons.
SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT SHOES, YOU ASSHOLE! YOU'RE THE WORST WINGMAN EVER!
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
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