Having a random hookup so left but love u
Quick, to the slutcave!
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
I just cut open the plastic package of a Plan B pill using the bottle opener I carry in my purse. #whyidrink
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
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