Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
Randomize
