What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
The carpet cleaning people refuse to steam clean human feces. I'll call back later and blame it on the dog not you
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
Randomize
