fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
Randomize
