I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
Randomize