Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
How does it feel to date your dad?
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
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