My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
Officially locked in my status as an indifferent millennial by downloading Tinder.
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
Randomize
