I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
Randomize
