I fucking hate vegan toaster pastries. You don't fuck with poptarts. It's like baseball...it's the backbone of american sport and you don't change it. Poptarts are the backbone of american fatasses and you don't just go changing them.
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
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