thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize
