i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize
