In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
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