Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
is that a dick in a sweater?
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
Randomize
