Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
