I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
vagina is talking i cant
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
Randomize
