What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
somehow attending a funeral viewing turned into me snorting cocaine in the bathroom and drawing ninja turtles for children
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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