I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
Just got a message on OkCupid from a 20-year-old who has "Momma's Boy" tattoed across his chest and thinks the earth is bigger than the sun.
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
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