Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
It was like getting head from an anaconda
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Randomize
