Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
Randomize
