sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
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