i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
Saw a sign earlier "Domino's Lava Cakes $3.00" and I thought of you. This text brought to you by thing I don't need to know about your sex life.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
I can't trust your balls anymore.
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
