lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
I'm, like, this 🤏🏼 close to buying crocs
And you're also 🤏🏼 to never putting your dick inside me again
Randomize
