I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
Randomize
