I'd rather drink alone in my closet than hang out with that girl
i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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