Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
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